I’m ready to start dealing with my gender issues now. I don’t want to ignore this anymore, I just want to be able to be myself, but I need to figure out how I can make that work in my life. I can’t live full-time as Rebecca right now but I also can’t ignore that part of myself. And I hate talking about “sides” or “parts” of myself. I don’t want to be forced to be either Rebecca or George. I just want to be ME. So, I’m ready to deal with this and try to figure out how to move forward. Again!
I’ve been growing my hair out since December and it’s getting longer, but it’s a big mess and really needs to be styled. I found someone who is comfortable working with tg folks and knows my situation, so I think I’ll be making an appointment with her. I bought a flat iron and will attempt to learn how to use that. I also got some scrunchies because my hair is just long enough to make a tiny little ponytail! I played around with my hair today but couldn't do much with it, so I'll be scheduling an appointment with the hair stylist as soon as possible!
The anti-depressants I started last month have been working, although the past week they’ve been causing some anxiety problems, so we’re cutting back the dose, which seems to be helping.
Now that the weather has warmed up I’ve been able to get most of the garden planted, and I’ve also got a bunch of seeds germinating inside. Today the first peas and beans poked through the soil! I need to get another garden plot dug out, but it rained all weekend. Hopefully it will dry out enough in a few days to get that done, assuming it ever stops raining! But I did enjoy having the weekend to relax. I hauled over two cords of firewood last week from a neighbor's house down the street who cut down several trees, and I’m still sore from that, along with having a big chuck of wood fall on my toe, which is now a lovely shade of purple. I guess I need to realize I can’t do as much as I was able to do when I was younger.
So, I feel like I've emerged from the darkness and am ready to face life once again. And I'm happy to back blogging again, and I plan to stay a while this time!
Rebecca
8 comments:
It's alright if you come and go, we've all done it. You just need to focus on being you, you're right. If it's not full transition, then fine! You do whatever you need to do to focus on just being well. I'm glad things seem to be looking brighter for you!
Glad to see you back and with ear decorations, missed you.
Caroline xxx
I'm so glad that you are putting your best foot forward girl! That's the hardest part sometimes. *hugs*
<3 Jerica
Hey look! She's back! Not to rub it in, but I have one itty bitty green tomato so far (and lots of blooms) and my peas have reached the trellis.
Thanks Lori, it’s good to be back! I hope you’re doing well.
Thanks Caroline! Unfortunately they’re just clip-ons. But I plan to give pierced ears another try at some point soon.
I try Jerica, but every time I put my best foot forward I keep tripping!
LOL Admit Sophie, you enjoy rubbing it in!! My tomatoes aren’t anywhere near blooming yet. But my peas are growing like crazy, and I’ve got tons of tiny little strawberries!
Where are my manners?! I meant to say the hair is cute, I like it!
Nice to hear things are improving.
I love the picture of you in this post, Rebecca. Nice red top!
Calie xxx
Please go back into your cocoon, your freaking me out and scaring the neighborhood children.
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