As usual it’s been a while since I last posted so I have a lot to catch up on.
My name was legally changed to Rebecca on January 23rd, which was a really meaningful event for me, especially with both my kids there with me. Then it was on to the SS Office and the DMV. It was so exciting to get a new license with my correct name and a new picture; I keep looking at it because it just makes me feel really neat! So I’ve been busy getting other things changed as well, and my old male name is no longer in existence at work. It’s so nice to have a new e-mail address which reflects me real name. I feel like I continue to slough off the layers of the old me and feel the new me emerge.
And in just over three weeks I’m having a tracheal shave to finally get rid of my horrid adam’s apple, which will be huge for me. I can’t imagine not having to worry about whether it’s showing and always having to wear a scarf or a turtleneck. I know it will do wonders for my self-confidence and being more comfortable I public. I’m also getting a nose job and some work done on my chin. I’m so excited about this and can’t believe it’s actually happening. I know there are widely differing opinions about FFS, but for me it’s something I feel will help me a lot in many ways. I’ve always been very self-conscious about my adam’s apple and nose, and I think this will go a long way towards my ability to feel like I “pass”, which I know is also another of those hot topics. My main goal in passing is to just blend in so I can live my life and not have to deal with rude comments and stares. I am comfortable with myself and I’m getting better at not caring about what other people say or do, but I’d rather just not draw any attention to myself. I think the FFS will bring me a greater degree of peace of mind.
Winter still hasn’t shown up yet, for which I’m very grateful! My oldest son has moved back home with me and my younger son, so that’s added a bit more stress to my life. But I think it will allow me to help him deal with the bi-polar issue by having me around; at least I hope so. My youngest son was just accepted at Mizzou, so now we’re just waiting to hear if he’ll get an ROTC scholarship. I’d love for him to get a college degree and to have the experience of going to college, and I’d also have him around for another four years. Work is going well, although there have been a few bumps in the road at times.
So all things considered life is good and my transition is going better than I ever could have imagined.
7 comments:
What a joy to read a post like this, the more so for the trials of getting here.
Best of luck with the surgeries and face the world with added confidence.
Great news all around, Rebecca! And don't forget, pitchers and catchers report in just a few days.
If passing is important to you, it doesn't matter whether it's a controversial subject. It's important to me as well, as anything that aids my confidence and reduces the odds of confrontation would be. Don't worry about anyone else.
Delighted that things are going well for you!
I agree with Leslie on this as it does seem to be a sensitive matter for you and other. I
Last time I went to Southern Comfort, I saw several surgeons pitching for FFS a little to hard for some girls who probable didn't really need it. But that is my feeling. Hope your sons do well
Cheers and Peace+
Hi Rebecca,
It's wonderful to hear that things are moving along in a good way. The past year or so has been a little less than smooth sailing for you and your sons, but my prayers for all of you have been answered even better than expected. PRAISE THE LORD!
As I do for all of us out here, I will continue to pray for good things to take place in your future, and this includes your sons.
And I will definitely be praying for your surgeries to go smoothly and with a speedy recovery. We will all be looking forward to a new photo of you.
Hugs and Prayers,
And Happy Valentine's day.
Cynthia XX
Hi Rebecca
I have been enjoying your blog very much, particularly your letter to your sons. It has given me a few clues on how to write a similar letter to my own son in the next six months or so. My daughter has known for several years courtesy of some deliberately released speculation by my ex which was very hard to deal with. I think she was hoping that it would end any relationship with my children and it was touch and go for a while. Things are working out well with my daughter although she is yet to meet me as Rachel.
Passing is a vexed issue but like you, I just want to be able to go about my business without that little pause before being addressed, the stares at the pool or in the street etc. Just to be who I am, just me.
I hope 2012 proves to be a great year for you, I think you are over due for a good one.
Best wishes Rachel
Oh my gosh congratulations! I havent been browsing these blogs in a while so it seems I've missed a lot! The name change and trach shave, yay lots of good stuff going on. =) I'm so happy for you, girl =)
Dont sweat the trach shave btw, it's pretty easy =)...and heals up nice!
Sorry I'm late to the party, Rebecca, but just haven't had time to read blogs (or write).
It sure is nice to see you happy and progressing well in your transition. By now, I suppose you have had the surgery. I hope all is well and your happiness continues to build.
Calie xxx
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